RSSAlthough He Hasn’t Been Tested, I’m Pretty Sure It’s ADD
While making dinner I remarked to The Partner that something in the fridge was stinking. I open the door and ask, “Smell that? What is that? Is that your carrots?” He pulls out the two bags of carrot sticks, smells them, examines them for rot, says no.
He pulls out a jug of lime-green margarita mix that’s probably been in the fridge since last summer and asks, “God, how long’s this been in here?” He puts it on the counter. Neither one of us bothers with the jug of yellow margarita mix that’s been in there for at least two years, nor the jug of sour mix that’s a year old. “These beans have been in there a while now, right?” The Partner takes out the bowl of beans/rice/eggs and puts it on the counter. The microwave dings.
We eat and watch S2E4 of the X-Files. Afterwards we get ready to walk the dog, me going upstairs to brush and floss, The Partner doing whatever in the kitchen. A couple minutes later he joins me in the upstairs bathroom to brush his teeth. “It was the beans that stunk,” he informs me while putting toothpaste on his brush, “I threw them away.”
While brushing I garble out, “Did you flush* them?” He garbles, “No, I put them in the garbage.” I shoot him a look, thinking he’s joking. I asked him again. He nods. I rinse my mouth out and say, “Seriously. Did you really put them in the garbage?” I’m sure I asked him a few more times, shoving him once or twice in the “get out of here!” manner.
I stare at him blankly.
“You’re fucking serious? You put rotting beans in the garbage can? It’s going to stink up the house! Plus, I just took out the garbage today! It’s a new bag!”
“I’ll take it out. I guess I wasn’t thinking.”
“Obviously! Why would you do that? Were you thinking, ‘Shit, I’ll just dump the stinking food into the new bag, the new bag that won’t have to be taken out for two weeks.’ What the fuck?”
“I guess. I don’t know!”
Later while on the walk he admits: “I did think about it when I dumped the beans into the garbage and they plopped on the bottom.”
_________
*Our garbage disposal is finicky and is currently not working.
RSS
haha, this cracked me up
hilarious! may I ask how old the beans were?
Great. Now everyone knows I have an absent mind. =(
Don’t Suicide 2.0 me, bro!
I really, really miss El Rodeo. Mexican food in Australia consists of doritos and salsa.
1. We can try shipping some to you
2. You can come back
3. You can open your own restaurant
1. you can try. Can’t promise I’ll eat any
2. phhhggg, to Indiana?
3. nope, can’t even buy the ingredients here
There is no trace of Latin American culture here in Australia… it’s every Republican’s dream